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Trauma and Relationships

Trauma profoundly affects relationships, and relationships are crucial to healing.

How Trauma Affects Relating​

Attachment wounds: Early trauma often affects attachment: our capacity to connect securely with others.

Trust difficulties: Trauma, especially interpersonal trauma, makes trusting others difficult.

Isolation: Many trauma survivors isolate to feel safe, but isolation prevents the co-regulation needed for healing.

Hypervigilance in relationships: Constantly scanning for threat, misinterpreting neutral cues as dangerous.

Reenactment: Unconsciously recreating traumatic dynamics in current relationships.

Healing Happens in Relationship​

Why relationships matter for healing:

  • Trauma often happens in relationship (abuse, neglect, betrayal)
  • Healing from relational trauma requires relational repair
  • Co-regulation (from others' calm nervous systems) helps our nervous system settle
  • We are social mammals: connection is a biological need

This doesn't mean you must process trauma directly in relationship: Solitary practices like TRE are valuable. But having connection and support around the practice supports the healing process.

For more on this, see Co-regulation and Safety.